You don’t run. You don’t lift. But you will emotionally spiral over a Monday night fumble. This shirt admits the truth: fantasy football is the only place left where you feel powerful. Your body may be breaking down, but your waiver game is razor sharp. Wear it like a jersey. Cry into it like a trophy. Because this is it, champ. This is the last arena that still lets you pretend.

This isn’t just a t-shirt. It’s a wearable flashback. The tri-blend fabric delivers that broken-in, pre-haunted fit—like it’s been through a few emotional playoff losses already. It’s soft, it’s durable, and yes—it survives the spin cycle better than you survived the 8th grade championship.

Material Regret Breakdown:

• 50% polyester, 25% combed ring-spun cotton, 25% rayon (aka the holy trinity of softness and denial)

• Fabric weight: 3.4 oz/yd² – featherlight for heavy memories

• Pre-shrunk so it won’t betray you later

• 40 singles, because you’re not

• Regular fit: structured like your former discipline

• Side-seamed like your unresolved emotions